sunny days

I cant believe how warm it is today! It was so nice to get outside and go to the park with Ramsey and some friends and have the sun shining down on us!

I havent blogged in a while, i really havent had much to say. We are still very encouraged by everyone and their prayers and are thankful for the support we do have. I think right now we are just trying to get through each day some days are ok and some days are terrible where we are full of anger and sadness.

My biggest struggle right now is trying to remember things about Evie. I dont know what it is but i feel like i cant remember anything about the girls when it was them together. I want to watch videos to hear her voice, look at pictures to see her smile but sometimes the more i do the angrier i get. Grief is definintely a rollercoaster of emotions, thoughts and feelings. We have started counseling and really enjoyed our first session. I think it will be very good for us.

We went back to church for the first time last Sunday. This was very hard for me for some reason. I didnt really want to go but i knew i needed to go. I was very hesitant to go into the sanctuary because that is where Evies service was, i am sure i will eventually but i can't sit in there and look at the pulpit, so we went to the service in the gym. I struggled so much with singing. I couldn't bring myself to sing all the praise songs. I wanted to but couldnt, i wasnt in a "praise Jesus" mood. I just cried the whole time. I was inspired by our speaker though, Crawford Loritts. He was really great and spoke about revival and how we need God to revive our hearts. What a very personal sermon for me to hear.

Well now i am honestly sitting hear with a blank mind so i think i will just show you some recent pics of what we have been doing :)

We found out our friends Brent and Debra are having a BOY! Cameron David will be here in June :)

Riley and Ramsey are so excited about their new boyfriend...

My friend Stephanie came in town!

We had dinner at her parents and played with Robbins and William

Ramsey had a stare down with Sophie :)

We celebrated the birth of sweet Hannah with a sip and see with friends.

This is Meredith with her two girls and her mom.
We went to Sega gym when it snowed this week. Ramsey loved jumping on the trampoline and running around. We did smack our face on the ground though and ended up with a big knot on our forwhead and a bloody nose..but we got over it pretty fast and did it all over again.

Pump it up for preschool time...do not go on MLK day.. it was crazy!

This picture trips me out though. I think we are making the same screaming face! ha

Another friend from highschool, Anna, came in town with her two kiddos and we played all day at my parents then had a wonderful girsl night out. This mainly envolved going to GiGi's to get cupcakes and then driving all around looking at homes. We actually used to do this when we were in hghschool. We would drive all around the million dollar home neighborhoods. I don't know why this was fun, but it was with a car full of girlfriends. Then we met Hayley and Lyndi for drinks and apps at Elfos. We did alot of reminiscing which was so fun and i truly was at peace the whole time i was with these girls. Everytime i am with my dgroup girls which is Hayley, Stephanie( who i talked about earlier)Anna and Lyndi and our leader, Amber, who is now my sis in law, i think of our group verse. Hebrews 10:24-25 "And let us consider how we may spur one another to love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but encourage one another and all more as you see the day approaching". I think it is very rare for a group to remain friends and keep in touch for this long. We were put together as a discipleship group when we were freshman in highschool, almost 15 years ago!

Ramsey and Ellie

Garland and Will

My friend Katie painted this awesome picture and gave it to me last night. Katie is a wonderful artist who sells paintings in stores around Memphis and also has Art and Soul Paint Parties. The parties are so much fun, check out the one i had here. I absolutely love it, i will treasure this!

Evie is on the left and Ramsey is on the right :)

Yesterday while Ramsey was at school my friends Audra and Anna surprised me with a spa day!! We felt like the Real Housewives of Germantown! ha We got massages and then they had lunch and mimosas for us after. It was the perfect day with sweet friends.
I really dont know what i would do without Jonathan, Ramsey, my family and friends. One thing we have been told is to Cling to God and Cling to each other during this time and we are doing our best.

Today i am clinging to this verse, that my friend Emily shared with me on a frame she sent for Ramsey. "Therefore you now have sorrow, but i will see you again and your heart will rejoice and no one will take your joy away from you" John 16:22