Christmas Time

Christmas used to be my favorite time of year. I was obsessed with decorating, buying presents and  everything else. When Evie died I dreaded Christmas. Every thing about it brought a memory, good and bad. We always got a new tree but we stopped that tradition and bought a fake one the year after she died. Was it ok if i put her stocking up? What do i do?

Two years ago I bought an angel stocking and had great plans to take Ramsey and fill it with toys she thought Evie would like and then donate them. It never worked out that way. I guess she is too young and she didn't understand exactly. I know its something I would like for her to do when she is older or maybe she will think of something. This year I decided to get all new stockings. I guess i needed a fresh start or something. I bought another angel one for her and then one for Ramsey, Reese and Nala.

So this year i actually felt a peace about Christmas. I was happy to decorate again. It wasn't a chore this year or something I was doing to keep me busy like it had been the past 3 years.
I took out the ornaments that I cherish with Evie's picture and other special ornaments people sent us and could look at them and smile instead of want to crawl in a hole and cry.
I was told each year would get "easier". I almost didn't want to believe it but it is true. I think about Evie all the time. She is mentioned almost everyday in our home and I pray it will always be that way.